When I was in high school in Kansas, I couldn’t decide what I liked more: writing or creating visual art. It was a huge struggle for me and I split my time between two accelerated programs that allowed me to deeply explore and revel in both. But I really couldn’t choose which I loved more. Others would praise me for my visual art skills but writing doesn’t immediately illicit that same praise - not at that level anyway - but it lit me up. I loved both subjects and threw my heart into both but there is just something about the unbridled imagination that flows into a literary piece and words are easily accessible in a way that visual art falls short many times. See, even now I can balance the two out with equal but different pros and cons. It’s a thing I do… see the balance in things. I tend to understand the nuances that are unseen by most in a way that runs a connective tissue through them. It has led me to fall into a liason role in just about every facet of my life whether I wanted it or not. Ah, but I digress. This is about word and image not about my tendencies… or perhaps that’s exactly what it’s about. My tendency to dig for meaning beyond what is evident. To identify the essence of a person, situation, brand, relationship… you name it, I find it and people aren’t always ready to hear or see it. It gets me into a bit of trouble now and again. Both mediums of personal expression: word and image are powerful and have rooted themselves deeply in my life. So much so that my teachers for each subject travelled over 1,400 miles many years later to attend my wedding in NYC. The vast majority of my very large extended family declined that same invitation so you can see the weight of these relationships on my life. Anyway, it wasn’t until I learned of something called graphic design that I realized that I could blend those two loves together to make deep, amazing meaning. That I could tell a story with the senses and help to transform and move people. I fell deeply in love with this idea and it consumed me so much that while at The Rhode Island School of Design, I stayed steadfast in the GD department even though I felt called to printmaking, glassblowing, and textile design. I told myself that I could wrap that all into graphic design in good time so just stay laser focused on the prize. I pursued my dreams at RISD and then headed into the world to happen upon branding and brand strategy and those, my friends, drove the next 20 years of my life. To me, Branding was the ultimate in blending those two loves and it was pure joy to help brands big and small tell their unique stories, sell their newest amazing thing, and differentiate from the competitors. I got to do some pretty fantastic work during that time, naming the Roomba floor vac, working with Robert DeNiro to launch Nobu Hotels, and even some work on the sets of the Oscars. It was pretty fantastic until it wasn’t. It took so much out of me to run at that level but I was rising through the ranks at a rapid pace and soon found myself as a Creative Director leading an entire studio of creative powerhouses… pulling all-nighters together and creating on demand. The design field is treacherous and sucks a lot out of you if you let it. I let it. I believed that the sacrifices made me better, more capable, more creative, more legit. I was running huge campaigns for Coca-cola and Covergirl and on the outside, it looked pretty fabulous but I was losing myself every minute. Sure, it was fun and thrilling…. but at what cost? I had always run the strategy of go, go, go - stealing from sleep to accomplish magical work that blew clients away. I thrived on that external validation, I loved to save the day… truth be told, I still kinda love that feeling. But I forgot about me entirely and over time I lost touch with what I really wanted most, which was to tell stories, make connections, bring the unseen into the light, truly help others and be of service, find the crux of it - the essence - and then authentically breathe life into it. I had forgotten to own my own story. I got married, became a mom, lost myself some more, dove into parenthood with the same zest and passion that I had with my career and hit the same wall. So I decided it was time to look inward and reconnect with that little girl who knew she just wanted to be free, create, and move people. I’ve been on this excavation journey for over a decade now and it’s been a trip. In that time, we’ve had two kids, 3 homes, lived on both coasts, at least 17 crazy over the top handmade and designed kid birthday parties, many exciting jobs and some not so much, tears, laughter, and a shit ton of epiphanies.
We moved from Brooklyn, which I loved tremendously by the way, to the East Bay five years ago to try something new, to grow and learn, and to push out of our comfort zones. Most importantly, we saw that we were headed into the next phase of our lives and instead of following the safe path of heading to a suburb, trying to recreate our crazy city life, we decided to choose adventure. It was time to stop talking about it and put our money where our mouths were and teach our children that life is an adventure and we are at the helm. We are the architects of our own dreams, we belong wherever we want to belong, and home is simply where you make it. That’s not all rainbows and unicorns like it sounds but we rooted down in the belief that if it’s a mistake you can either shift your priorities or course correct. It’s all within our power. So we moved across the country to SF where we didn’t know a soul and began to set up camp and put down roots. It has taken a really long time to feel settled. Well, not so much for the kids who went to sleep in Brooklyn and woke up in Berkeley and never missed a beat. The adults…. yeah, not so much. It was just before Covid hit that we were finally feeling great about being here and what we had created in the last five years. Throughout the stay at home orders and spikes in cases, we have fallen madly in love with our house, especially our backyard, the weather, and the landscape of this beautiful place. So it’s no surprise that we invited in joy, happiness, growth, and love… and even more adventure!
Ravi unexpectedly lost his job to Covid, a job he really loved full of fun and exciting work that truly helped people live better lives. It was a huge wakeup call for us as we struggled all summer to land a new gig. I say we because it was a total team effort. We are good like that… creativity and collaboration are our love languages so you hand us a disaster and we are gonna find the golden thread to pull you through and find something cooler on the other side. He found an incredible opportunity with a new company but it involves another move. It took a hot minute for us to wrap our heads around that but we came to the conclusion, perhaps kicking and screaming, that one of our family core values is adventure. Not the trekking through the Amazon kind of adventure per se, but stepping into the unknown and saying yes to possibility. Sometimes I may dwell too long in possibility and not enough action… but that is a topic for another day and grace is also a very powerful tool in the toolbox. And well, if we are living our values, here’s to life being an adventure….
So that brings us to now. Given the opportunity that came to us out of necessity, coupled with our sense of discovery and adventure, we have been given the almost impossible choice to leave yet another place we’ve fallen in love with and CHOOSE where the next leg of our big family adventure will take us. We get to choose between L.A. and Vancouver B.C. What?! Yep, two incredible places that we have either never been to or only vacationed at a couple of times. How do you make that choice? In a global pandemic with cases on the rise? Well… you look at what’s in front of you and you find the gems, then you draw the thread and you root yourself in deep gratitude… and get really freaking creative. Then you let go of some of the resistances; the would haves, could haves, should haves and have the courage to ask for what you want and need. Oh and trust… trust is a big ol’ whopping ingredient in adventure. Trust that you are worthy and deserving, trust that it will happen, trust that there are forces at work in your favor if you get out of your own way. And guess what?! It generally comes to you. Maybe not in the exact way you anticipated, but surely in exactly how you need it to be. Whether you know it or not. So, while we would never have hoped for our children to be in distance learning, working from home and isolated from friends and family… it’s a blessing because we can do that from any location. As we are all remote working at the moment, we can pick up the whole family and head to each city to spend some real time there. To live, work, explore, and test it out. What an amazing opportunity to be still and listen to the whispers of change in our ears. Go grab the vibe and see what fits best for all four personalities in our crew. It actually offers up so much more opportunity than had this been in pre-Covid times. We get to experience these places and choose as a family what’s next for us. It’s bittersweet and invigorating all at the same time. We are all in a time where many things are simply out of our control and I am keenly aware that this is overwhelmingly the case with children right now. They are being told where they can and can’t go, who they can go with, what is safe or not, that a space they thought of as extremely safe: school is no longer safe in the same ways they knew, how to engage with school, how to be with friends… the world. They are resilient beings, this is true - and they are living through uncertainty with no handle for comfort in a way that we could not fathom 9 months ago. This move will be an added layer to that story so we believe it’s important to hear their voices, wishes, desires, dreams, and to empower them to believe they matter. So we get the beautiful opportunity to go on an adventure together, to explore two amazing places and to contemplate what’s next for us all, while navigating an ever increasing global pandemic. There will be bumps along the way and it’s not going to be all rainbows and unicorns but that’s the beauty of it all. We believe that creativity always saves the day so it’s time to show up and show out. Again.
So here’s to the journey into the unknown, and to stepping forward with an open heart to embrace it all. We are here to share the journey in real time. To note the challenges, the failures, the triumphs and nuances… all the crazy business that goes along with change. Big or small. We are all creatures of habit so the unknown is scary… and fear is debilitating. But this time, I’ve got some new tools in my belt that help me to speak my truth and thank fear for showing up. And then, like a velvet hammer I will simply tell fear to step the eff back up. I’m choosing differently.
Here’s to that journey. Creativity saves the day. Adventure awaits….
